Self-advocacy is the art of speaking up for yourself and your interests. Self-advocacy is making yourself a priority by standing up for your wants and needs like you never have before.
Early in my career I was a part of a small leadership team. Way too often during our regular meetings one member of the team would shoot down almost any idea I brought up. Our supervisor, a delightful mentor of mine, pulled me aside to tell me to stand up for myself. She helped me see that I was shutting down and playing the introvert card instead of defending my good ideas. This was my introduction to self-advocacy.
In preparing for this blog post, I found a wonderful article on the importance of self-advocacy that outlined 3 key elements of self-advocacy: Understanding, knowing, and communicating. That article was addressing the needs of young people, but I think it can be a relevant framework to help you better advocate for 3 components of your mid-life health.
Advocating for Your Physical Health
Menopause and its impact on a woman's life is horribly misunderstood by way too many doctors. The science is severely lacking and we pay the price for that. If you are ever told by a medical provider that your symptoms "are just because of your age" thank them for their time and head for the door. Advocate for yourself by finding a doctor who will take your chaos as seriously as you do.
You need to understand your symptoms. Collect data about the symptoms and anything outside the norm that could contribute to them.
You need to know that every woman's experience with menopause is different and that you don't have to suffer.
Then, you need to interview doctors until you find one you connect with so you feel supported when communicating your situation to them.
Advocating for Your Mental Health
Mid-life brings with it all kinds of changes and it feels like they come all at once. If you have kids you will see changes to your family dynamics. You might see changes to your tolerance for certain relationships. The changes to your body can be frightening. And if that's not enough, the way your brain copes with the stress of it all changes. Advocate for yourself by asking for help when needed and giving yourself grace to step back when needed.
As with your physical health, you need to understand your symptoms. Collect data about the symptoms and anything that could contribute to them.
You are the expert on you. Now is the time to know the science behind the impact to your mental health from hormones and aging.
Then, you need to communicate your needs with those you love and those you interact with regularly as they arise. Please note I didn't say apologize! If you are honest about your struggles, they are more likely to be understanding.
Advocating for Your Financial Health
This is the time for clarity on how your career will wind down and on what you want your retirement to look like. Are you thinking about retiring from your current career and making money from a hobby or second career? It's time to take the pulse of your savings and your desires so you can afford the future you want. Advocate for yourself by reinventing yourself so you feel fulfilled and accomplished in retirement.
You need to understand how your career plays into your purpose in life. Too often, when people retire, they feel lost because they were one in the same.
You need to know how much money you have available now and in the future. If you are a woman who let your husband take care of the money, now is the time to ask lots of questions.
Then, you need to communicate your expectations and desires with your spouse and your financial advisor. Make sure your dreams are heard.
What do you need to understand, know, and communicate when it comes to your physical, mental, and financial health?
Mid-life requires that we understand our chaos, know what we want, and communicate with those who can help us. Self-advocacy is a muscle to train and a tool to use. Not sure how to get started? Schedule a complimentary strategy session today at https://newleafwellnessllc.as.me/
Here are a few resources to help you better advocate for your:
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